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The long forgotten and Short Lived U-95 Turbine
Unlimited Hydroplane. (Image source: thunderboats.ning.com)
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As apparently Hydroplane racing is dying a slow,
agonizing death? Since it's unthinkable that one of Seattle's most cherished
Sporting events No longer garners local Print media coverage...
Author's Note
This No Fenders tome was written the week
following Seafair on August 5th, whilst on temporary Sabbatical in Tacoma, WA -
In-between migrating South. But was subsequently "Washed Down" in Thy
Move to Oregon and has been Bobbing in thou Surf ever since.
But what better time to rescue this Message
in A Bottle than on a Winter's soggy Day upon Ye Oregonian Coast, 'R Mateys'
Perhaps you've previously
read me here upon No Fenders ramblin' on about my formative years as a Seattle
Youth when Unlimited Hydroplanes ruled the Roost in the Emerald City,
and was the largest Sporting event, especially
before those Seattle SuperSonics Heated up en route to becoming World Champions
in 1979!
Ironically the very same year another
Warshintonion' legend won his very first Unlimited Hydroplane race aboard The Squire
Shop! As the driver in Questione was none other than thou legendous' Chip
Hanauer.
As my euphoria towards these magnificent
flying boats includes a small Hydroplane Button collection, which includes a
fairly unique U-95 button, for which this Hull was the Sport's very first-ever
Turbine-powered Hydro.
Silent Seafair Thunder U-95
Although I was in Oregon during the weekend
of Seafair, nonetheless I found it extremely Disappointing when returning to
Tacoma Monday evening following the race. (8/5) When attempting to learn the 2018
Albert Lee Appliance Cup's outcome via my NFB Newsline for The Blind telephone
service.
Since I didn't feel like logging onto the All
knowing "Intrawoods" late that evening, since as a Blind person, it's
very difficult and annoying working "In the Dark!" Especially when
Yuhs cannot see what you're reading; but I digress...
Alas, I found it Uber' embarrassing when
scouring five of my former Home State's "vaunted" Newspapers, which
Not only had NOTHING! Regarding the Unlimited Hydroplanes, whilst one of them
doesn't even post news online until Wednesdays, which is Tuesday's regurgitated
news; SHEISA!
First I tried the only viable newspaper
remaining, The Seattle Times, although the Newsline version
provided doesn't have a Sports section; WTF! And they've also gotten rid of the
Other Sports section, so I only had the Northwest and Outdoors sections to
choose from. Which naturally both had NOTHING!
As I Don't like
bandying the word Discriminating around... But it's Uber' Disappointing that
The Seattle Times Doesn't provide Full, 100% Access to its Newspaper for the
Blind! Since I could find News upon the race only via their (Online) internet
website's content, which includes the Sports and Other Sports sections...
Next I tried the Associated Press
for Washington's Sports section, for which the only racing related news was
who'd won the Northwest Nationals at Pacific Raceways in Kent, WA. Which I'm
happy that Antron Brown broke his winless streak en route to scoring his 50th
"Wally!" (winners trophy)
And The Seattle Post Intelligencer,
which is a pathetic shell of its former self, with an anemic Online content
version only, ironically was the only Newspaper of the five I searched in-State
that had anything relating to Seafair. Although they just featured one story
upon the late, famous Alvin M. Tex' Johnston's amazing display of Barrel
Rolling not once, but twice the then experimental Boeing 367 Dash-80 Jetliner.
While the second
story was on how to escape Seattle during Seafair weekend...
Next, for humour, just to confirm what I
already knew, I selected the Tacoma News Tribune,
better known as the "TNT," witch sadly only finds itself able to post
news Online pathetically three days a week, Wednesday-Friday, with its content
being from the day before; CRAP!
Which was even sadder when Wednesday's edition was
finally available with a robust four riveting Stick 'N Ball stories in its
Sports section; BARF!
And finally in desperation, I searched the Tri City
Herald, since after all the Hydros' had roared upon
the Mighty Columbia, which I crossed twice over Seafair weekend, the week prior
in Kennewick, WA.
As I checked these five "News"
sources contents for both Sunday's and Monday's articles, and find it a pretty condemning
statement towards the allure of Unlimited Hydroplane racing in the State that
the majority of the remaining competitors call Home, and are based out of.
Yet Surely? Don't Call me Shirley! The H1
Unlimited Hydroplanes Official website would be Chock O'Block Full of News,
Righto?
STEEE-RIKE!
As it's pretty SAD that the sport's official
website cannot even provide any substantive information upon how many
competitors showed up for the weekend, or how Qualifying went; SHIT!
thus after spending copious amounts 'O time
searching for any related material before giving up in Disgust! I'm left being
only able to ARSE-sume' that the same nine Hydros showed up at the Stan Sayres
Pits on Friday, August 3rd.
While I've still got NO Clue if the Unlimited
Hull Cal Phipps was driving, the U-1918 Oberto was simply his U-27 ride renamed
for the weekend? Or the two Warshitonian' events?
And it now seems like it was a bit Karmic
that The Seattle Times published a story prior to this year's Albert Lee
Appliance Cup about Jimmy Shane and the U-1 Miss Home Street being out of
National High Points Championship contention, since Shane faltered once again.
As My Numero Uno' Driver and Boat, saw Andrew
Tate and his U-9 Les Schwab giving Shane & Co. a good 'Ol Beatdown, after
the U-1 was assessed a one minute penalty for two Milling period infractions.
As Tate's third victory of the year coupled with
Shane's penalty saw the U-9 increase its National Points lead, although
certainly this was overshadowed by Cal Phipps spectacular Blowover during the
final race!