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Red Bull's Newest Junior Driver Academy member
Patricio "Pato" O'Ward. (Image source: thecheckeredflag.co.uk)
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Although O'Ward's currently completely Out of Sight
somewheres' in Japan. I for one, truly Hope he gets the call from Arrow McLaren
Racing SP to return to Indy Cars from the Wilderness...
So this past Month 'O may and Beyond
certainly has been Frenetic for Carlin during its Sophomore IndyCar campaign,
who quickly became my new favourite IndyCar team earlier this year.
As the most intriguing, and surprising News
for Mwah was the long ago announcement of Red Bull's inking of Rookie IndyCar Phenom
Patricio Pato' O'Ward to its Junior Team, with pretenses to a future Formula 1
Drive?
Although if I was the young Mexican, I'd be
weary of Der Helmet's promises, since the Austrian Overlord 'O Driver
Development Dr. Helmut Marko is quite quick to toss Drivers out a la Luke-warm
Bath Water!
As initially when ponderin' recent IndyCar to
Formula 1 Graduates, my mind recalled the names of Jacques Villeneuve, Juan
Pablo Montoya and Oh Yeah, Sealmeister B', aka Sebastain Bourdais.
Then thinking a Wee Bitamyte Harder, I
remembered that Shorty', aka Cristiano da Matta had driven for the Toyota F1
concern Wayback in 2003-04. Whilst Uhm, I'm 86% certain that le Hamburgular',
nee SeaBass' is the last IndyCar Driver to go to F1, circa 2008-09.
With Sebastian's Formula 1 career being less
than spectacular at the Back-marker Scuderia Toro Rosso outfit, where Bourdais
was Thee 'lil Bulls Team Principal Franz Tost's Punching Bag a Decade ago!
As let that sink
in a Wee Bitamyte' Patricio! As All I can Arse-sume' is that the lure 'O Thee
Energy Drinks Dinero far outweighed the lack of the requisite sponsorship
capital needed to continue racing in Indy Cars, Ci?
Obviously, SNAP! For Mwah, the most
successful "Yank" to graduate to Formula 1 from Indy Cars is none
other than SuperMario', aka Mario Andretti. With Mario having won the most
Grands Prix with 12 Wins to his credit, one ahead of some Plain Jane KuhNuck' Crooner
known as Jack Vanilla...
As both Mario and Jacques Villeneuve became
Formula 1 World Champions following their beginnings in IndyCar, with Andretti
having won the 1969 Indianapolis 500 and Villeneuve the 1995 Indy 500
respectively. With Mario being a Four-times IndyCar Champion (1965-66, 1969,
1984 ) vs. Jacques lone title in '95.
Whilst the only other Modern era IndyCar
Driver to graduate to Formula 1 and then win Grands Prix is Good 'Ol Monty',
aka Juan Pablo Montoya who netted seven F1 victories in his brief F1 career,
with the latter Duo of Da Matta and Bourdais both Failing to Break Thar Ducks!
Although Japan's Super Formula Open Wheel
Racing series has become a popular Finishing School for aspiring Formula 1
Drivers, especially for FIA Formula 2
Champions awaiting a Seat at the Big table, nee F1. O'Ward would be wise to
check out the careers of Stoffel Vandoorne, Pierre Gasley and Oh Yeah, the
former Red Bull Junior Team Driver Daniel Ticktum he's replacing, and
Ahem, What's his Name Brendon Hartley...
Meanwhile, we All know that Carlin had
nothing less than a Demoralizing Month 'O May, which strangely began with two
of its four Indy Cars suffering from niggling E-E-E-lectrics' - Hmm, N-O Prince 'O Darkness Lucas Electrics
Jokes Here; Hya!
Err electrical Gremlins, with both O'Ward and
some Smarmy Spaniard known here in Nofendersville as Fredrico Suave both being
afflicted. For which I can only guess were somehow related, possibly in their
respective chassis builds?
Whilst I won't belabour the Indianapolis 500
Flop McLaren indignantly endured, especially since I'll say it was mostly
Self-inflicted! In what appears to be a case of Arrogance! For which Zachery
Brown and McLaren have taken the easy way out.
And we All know of the trouble beginning with
not having a proper Steering Wheel ready for Fernando during Thar Texas Test.
Along with the ridiculousness of Not being able to run Alonso in practice at
Mother Speedway since the Back-up chassis was painted the wrong Shade 'O Kiwi
Orange, after Alonso had Smacked the Wall in his primary mount; Aye Karumba!
Damn It! I said
Kiwi Orange, Not Sunquisst Orange! Like Do I have to Do Everything' my Gory Self?
Although I cannot remember who it was now?
But thinking it was Racer's Marshall Pruett who put it most succinctly when
noting how Carlin had basically gone from a Two Car effort to Four, doubling its
work load for Indianapolis...
And can it really come down to just one component?
Having already lamented the various outcomes of another Minnowesqe' IndyCar
Team's struggles with top shelve Dampers; err Shocks; Can Y'all say Harding
Steinbrenner Racing?
Interestingly, during the Toronto weekend,
probably during Qualie' Me Thinks? 'Ol PT', aka Paul Tracy said that Carlin had
just switched from Multimatic Dampers after a year and a half to Penske Shocks
finally, and Max Chilton said they totally made a difference!
As we know how the Brit's elected to not G-O
Oval-track racing any more, which surely puts another Fly in Carlin's Ointment
with its revolving Cast of Drivers, which reminds Mwah of Dale Coyne Racing, Righto?
Yet I'm happy that this gives Conor Daly more
opportunities to race in Indy Cars, while 'Ol Narly Pinball', nee Charlie
Kimball certainly hasn't forgotten how to Drive, El Correctomundo? Whilst I'd
like to see RC Enerson get another outing for Carlin at Portland, since I don't
think they've announced who'll be driving the #31 yet?
Although suppose those were somewhat prophetic
words, upon learning that 'Ol Narly had "Tapped" thou Wall at Gateway
during the final Night-time practice, albeit Daly ended the same Bloody Night
session P1!
Then the Noblesville native put on a Highlight Reel
performance, with Townsend Bell repeatedly y noting how Daly Owned Turn 3, en
route to ultimately finishing sixth after flirting with a podium finish...
As the only miss-step besides not being able
to find the necessary Pesos to keep Pato onboard, or did Patricio force
Carlin's Hands by jumping to Red Bull's Driver Academy? Has been the curious
and hopefully Short-lived return of Sage Dangerboy' Karam, who I think is still
in need of covering up?
Although it's too
Bad that Josef's become All Penske Button-down Corporate Speak since making
that Hilarious video! But then again, suppose Newgarden's got other, more
important items on his Agenda right now, Eh?
And speakin' of
Newgarden. Could we please Drop the Lame Arse Jo New' moniker Mister T-Bell',
Puh-puh-please!
