Friday, August 30, 2019

Pato O'Ward Spreading his Wings whilst Carlin Aiming to Fly High again



Red Bull's Newest Junior Driver Academy member Patricio "Pato" O'Ward. (Image source: thecheckeredflag.co.uk)
Although O'Ward's currently completely Out of Sight somewheres' in Japan. I for one, truly Hope he gets the call from Arrow McLaren Racing SP to return to Indy Cars from the Wilderness...

So this past Month 'O may and Beyond certainly has been Frenetic for Carlin during its Sophomore IndyCar campaign, who quickly became my new favourite IndyCar team earlier this year.

As the most intriguing, and surprising News for Mwah was the long ago announcement of Red Bull's inking of Rookie IndyCar Phenom Patricio Pato' O'Ward to its Junior Team, with pretenses to a future Formula 1 Drive?

Although if I was the young Mexican, I'd be weary of Der Helmet's promises, since the Austrian Overlord 'O Driver Development Dr. Helmut Marko is quite quick to toss Drivers out a la Luke-warm Bath Water!


As initially when ponderin' recent IndyCar to Formula 1 Graduates, my mind recalled the names of Jacques Villeneuve, Juan Pablo Montoya and Oh Yeah, Sealmeister B', aka Sebastain Bourdais.

Then thinking a Wee Bitamyte Harder, I remembered that Shorty', aka Cristiano da Matta had driven for the Toyota F1 concern Wayback in 2003-04. Whilst Uhm, I'm 86% certain that le Hamburgular', nee SeaBass' is the last IndyCar Driver to go to F1, circa 2008-09.

With Sebastian's Formula 1 career being less than spectacular at the Back-marker Scuderia Toro Rosso outfit, where Bourdais was Thee 'lil Bulls Team Principal Franz Tost's Punching Bag a Decade ago!

As let that sink in a Wee Bitamyte' Patricio! As All I can Arse-sume' is that the lure 'O Thee Energy Drinks Dinero far outweighed the lack of the requisite sponsorship capital needed to continue racing in Indy Cars, Ci?

Obviously, SNAP! For Mwah, the most successful "Yank" to graduate to Formula 1 from Indy Cars is none other than SuperMario', aka Mario Andretti. With Mario having won the most Grands Prix with 12 Wins to his credit, one ahead of some Plain Jane KuhNuck' Crooner known as Jack Vanilla...

As both Mario and Jacques Villeneuve became Formula 1 World Champions following their beginnings in IndyCar, with Andretti having won the 1969 Indianapolis 500 and Villeneuve the 1995 Indy 500 respectively. With Mario being a Four-times IndyCar Champion (1965-66, 1969, 1984 ) vs. Jacques lone title in '95.

Whilst the only other Modern era IndyCar Driver to graduate to Formula 1 and then win Grands Prix is Good 'Ol Monty', aka Juan Pablo Montoya who netted seven F1 victories in his brief F1 career, with the latter Duo of Da Matta and Bourdais both Failing to Break Thar Ducks!


Although Japan's Super Formula Open Wheel Racing series has become a popular Finishing School for aspiring Formula 1 Drivers, especially  for FIA Formula 2 Champions awaiting a Seat at the Big table, nee F1. O'Ward would be wise to check out the careers of Stoffel Vandoorne, Pierre Gasley and Oh Yeah, the former Red Bull Junior Team Driver Daniel Ticktum he's replacing, and Ahem, What's his Name Brendon Hartley...


Meanwhile, we All know that Carlin had nothing less than a Demoralizing Month 'O May, which strangely began with two of its four Indy Cars suffering from niggling E-E-E-lectrics'  - Hmm, N-O Prince 'O Darkness Lucas Electrics Jokes Here; Hya!

Err electrical Gremlins, with both O'Ward and some Smarmy Spaniard known here in Nofendersville as Fredrico Suave both being afflicted. For which I can only guess were somehow related, possibly in their respective chassis builds?


Whilst I won't belabour the Indianapolis 500 Flop McLaren indignantly endured, especially since I'll say it was mostly Self-inflicted! In what appears to be a case of Arrogance! For which Zachery Brown and McLaren have taken the easy way out.

And we All know of the trouble beginning with not having a proper Steering Wheel ready for Fernando during Thar Texas Test. Along with the ridiculousness of Not being able to run Alonso in practice at Mother Speedway since the Back-up chassis was painted the wrong Shade 'O Kiwi Orange, after Alonso had Smacked the Wall in his primary mount; Aye Karumba!

Damn It! I said Kiwi Orange, Not Sunquisst Orange! Like Do I have to Do Everything' my Gory Self?

Although I cannot remember who it was now? But thinking it was Racer's Marshall Pruett who put it most succinctly when noting how Carlin had basically gone from a Two Car effort to Four, doubling its work load for Indianapolis...


And can it really come down to just one component? Having already lamented the various outcomes of another Minnowesqe' IndyCar Team's struggles with top shelve Dampers; err Shocks; Can Y'all say Harding Steinbrenner Racing?

Interestingly, during the Toronto weekend, probably during Qualie' Me Thinks? 'Ol PT', aka Paul Tracy said that Carlin had just switched from Multimatic Dampers after a year and a half to Penske Shocks finally, and Max Chilton said they totally made a difference!

As we know how the Brit's elected to not G-O Oval-track racing any more, which surely puts another Fly in Carlin's Ointment with its revolving Cast of Drivers, which reminds Mwah of Dale Coyne Racing, Righto?

Yet I'm happy that this gives Conor Daly more opportunities to race in Indy Cars, while 'Ol Narly Pinball', nee Charlie Kimball certainly hasn't forgotten how to Drive, El Correctomundo? Whilst I'd like to see RC Enerson get another outing for Carlin at Portland, since I don't think they've announced who'll be driving the #31 yet?

Although suppose those were somewhat prophetic words, upon learning that 'Ol Narly had "Tapped" thou Wall at Gateway during the final Night-time practice, albeit Daly ended the same Bloody Night session P1!

Then the Noblesville native put on a Highlight Reel performance, with Townsend Bell repeatedly y noting how Daly Owned Turn 3, en route to ultimately finishing sixth after flirting with a podium finish...

As the only miss-step besides not being able to find the necessary Pesos to keep Pato onboard, or did Patricio force Carlin's Hands by jumping to Red Bull's Driver Academy? Has been the curious and hopefully Short-lived return of Sage Dangerboy' Karam, who I think is still in need of covering up?


Although it's too Bad that Josef's become All Penske Button-down Corporate Speak since making that Hilarious video! But then again, suppose Newgarden's got other, more important items on his Agenda right now, Eh?

And speakin' of Newgarden. Could we please Drop the Lame Arse Jo New' moniker Mister T-Bell', Puh-puh-please!