Yep! It's that time of the year once again to honour the Disco Queen
of 'RASSCAR! Although I’ve got No idea think She’s got a Valentine's suitor this year?
Having just learned that Danica and Carter Comstock Broke up over a
year ago. Hmm? Isn’t “Tommy terrific,” aka Tom Brady available?
Nevertheless, here we go, And Ah One and Ah Two!
Toe to
toe
Dancing
very
slow
Barely
breathing
Almost
comatose…
(pressdog!)
Wall to
wall
People
hypnotized
And
they're
stepping
lightly
Hanging
on her every
move each night in Rapture
Back
to
back
Sacrailiac
Spineless
movement
And
a wild attack
Face
to
face
Sadly
solitude
And
it's
finger
popping
Twenty-four hour shopping
In ‘
“Flavour
Flav HMS Monogram told me everybody's high
DJ's
spinning'
are
saving'
my
mind
Flash
is
Fast,
Flash
is
cool
Jacke Vanilla sez fast, Flashe' no do
And
you try to stop
(Watching’ MAC
Montoya, Sam Hornish & ALL those Open Wheel DEFECTORS!)
SURE SHIT!
Just go out to the parking lot
Get
in
your
car
and
you
drive
real
far
Away from the track!
After you
drive
all
night,
you
see
a bright flashing light
And it comes right down and lands on the ground
And
out
pops
a Girl in a shiny sequin bathing suit from RASSCAR!
And you
try
to
run
but
She's
got
a gun
And
She
shoots
you
dead
and
“She
eats
your
head
And
then
you're
in
the
Girl from
RASSCAR!
You go
out
at
night,
eatin'
Racecars
You eat
And you
don't
stop,
you
keep
on
eatin'
Single
Seaters
Then,
when
there's
no
more
Racecars
left
You
go
out
at
night
and
eat
up
Open Wheel Racing series instead
Like Champ Car
and the IRL
While ‘Ol timers desperately cling
to fantasies of a renaissance…
Face to
face,
dance
cheek
to
cheek
One to
one,
man
to
man
Dance
toe
to
toe
Don't
move
to
slow,
'cause
the
Girl from
RASSCAR is cutting thru
(Excuse me HULIO!)
But Mrs. Hospenthal
is through
with
the competition
‘cause She's
been eatin'
a ton ‘O snicker bars
Yeah,
wall
to
wall,
door
to
door,
hall
to
hall
She's
gonna
eat
'em
all
Rapture…
Be pure
Take
a tour; through the sewer
Don't
strain
your
brain
Just check out that Sports
Illustrated Swimsuit issue instead!
And then say it real fast
Boog-itee-
Boog-itee- Boog-itee!
Paint a train, cause you’ll be singing' in the rain
If dare ain’t some ‘Tin Tops on
real soon
I say stop
throwin those mountain dew cans at Pretty Boy Floyd
Junior Nation!
Just be good ‘ol boyzs and cheer
for ‘dannaCar instead!
Well
now
you
see
what
you
want to
be
Just like Mike, who’s trying to
pump up ‘Dem Spin-Car ratings on TV
'Cause
the
Girl from
RASSCAR won't
eat
Candy bars
when
She’s PEAK-ing
In the bright
lights…
As now She's gone back up to MARS Where She won't have a hassle with the human race ‘cause now its ‘DannaLand!
And you
hip-hop,
and
you
don't
stop
Just
blast
off,
sure
shot
'Cause
the
Girl from
RASSCAR stopped
eatin'
Racecars
And
now
She
only
devours IndyCar
get up,
‘Cause She’s gone HOLLYWOOD!
(Original lyrics: Blondie, Rapture)
Originally written
by Tomaso on Feb 15, 2008
(Last Modified: February 7, 2023)
